A Famous Family
by Everlasting Purple
Summary: Mr. and Mrs. Lockhart, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly happy, thank you very much. Oh! What's this? Famous Harry Potter is coming to stay with his Aunt and Uncle? Hmm…wonder how that will work out?
1. Chapter 1

(I know I should not do this. I have a ton of stories I need to update and I should not post another one until they are complete, but damn it all this idea won't leave me alone! I was going to post this as a challenge that anyone could take, but then I found all the info I had for it and everything I wanted to do with it and I had to post it. Enjoy it anyways.)

A Famous Family

Sum: Mr. and Mrs. Lockhart, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly happy, thank you very much. Mr. Lockhart was both a published writer and a well known face on the TV for hair and teeth commercials. Oh! What's this? Famous Harry Potter is coming to stay with his Aunt and Uncle? Hmm…wonder how that will work out?

The boy who lived

Mr. and Mrs. Lockhart, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly happy, thank you very much. They were the last people you would expect be touched by a tragedy mostly because the husband was so darn cheerful it seemed nothing could make him frown.

Mr. Lockhart was both a published writer and a well known face on the TV for hair and teeth commercials. Mr. Lockhart was a squib, but he was practically famous in the muggle world, so who cared about the wizarding world? That was his attitude. Mrs. Lockhart didn't do much until their son Gilderoy Junior came along, and then she was a full time mother. Petunia Lockhart was a muggle, but she too had been touched by magic. You see her sister was a muggleborn, and of course this meant that Petunia had been pushed aside as a child as her parents attentions were more focused on the magical child.

Mr. Lockhart also had a magical sister only she was older than him. Instead of letting himself be pushed aside and getting some mundane job in a magical world he had broken free from that world and had made a name for himself in the other one.

Mr. Lockhart was a stud and Petunia was a sensible woman. He made woman swoon with his dashing good looks, yet he married plane Petunia Evans. She wanted everything to be normal and have a simple life, yet she married a rather unordinary man. Why did he marry her? Because there was no one else in the muggle world that could understand what he had gone though like she could and when someone was as glamorously complicated as he was it was nice to have someone simple to come home too. Why did she marry him? Because not only was it flattering to have someone so handsome interested in her more handsome even then her sister's boyfriend, but that he understood how she could both hate and love her sister. For both of then it was that common ground that they shared that enabled then to become what the other needed.

Gilderoy and Petunia were perfectly happy together. They brought a nice house and Gilderoy made good money. Petunia was soon pregnant with Gilderoy Jr. As far as the neighborhood went they were famous in their own right. Small time famous then as Gilderoy hadn't published his book yet, but they were content and happy.

Then one day there came a cat.

Mr. Lockhart awoke ridiculously early as he always did. He had an appointment at 10:00 therefore he found himself setting his alarm for 7 so he would have time to get ready. Of course as with most days he woke a good half hour before his alarm. Turning off the alarm so as not to wake Ms. Lockhart he quietly headed for his son's room.

This was a newer part of his routine, checking on Jr. as soon as he was awake so that he could beam happily and murmur, "That's my boy!" softly at his sleeping son. That part of his routine finished it was time for a 45 minute shower in which he become extremely clean. Then he would brush his teeth for ten minutes. Then he would dress and redress 3 or 4 times with the outfits he had laid out the other night. Today he deiced on a lilac dress shirt with his aquamarine tie and a rich brown colored pants. Upon reflection he added a shiny gold watch because everyone needed some glitter. Lastly with a bright look in his eyes he came to the hair.

Finally he met perfection in the mirror. Golden wavy hair, crystal blue eyes, and a dreamy smile. Yes he was perfect wasn't he? And his son would look just like him he was certain. Speaking of his son the boy had awoken sometime between his father's teeth brushing and hair styling. Petunia was up by now and would have his little boy up and breakfast started by now. Beaming at his watch as he realized he would have time to choose his son's outfit he skipped out of the bathroom.

In the kitchen he bid his wife a jolly good morning and proceeded to snatch Jr. and carry him to the nursery. During this trip his son made happy baby noises while Lockhart made happy proud father noises. Upon much deliberation and arguing with his son about what the child should ware they deiced on a baby blue shirt and shorts the same color as Lockhart himself was wearing. Now how does one argue about clothes to a tot one asks? By holding up different outfits and interpreting baby sounds as, "Not that one I simply must be dressed in periwinkle blue today. Alright if you insist the baby blue shirt will do, but only because it has zoo animals on it."

Holding his son above his head and making airplane sounds the two Gilderoy Lockharts, Sr. and Jr. returned to the kitchen. Lockhart always found breakfast to be challenging on the one hand it was his duty as the father of the most perfect child in the world to help his mother feed him, on the other hand he risked being pelted with baby food and having to take another shower and change his clothes. Petunia knowing of her husband daily dilemma and that he had an appointment that day insisted that she be the one to feed their son. While Lockhart did relent he looked mildly guilty though breakfast and made himself feel better by informing his son about the hundreds of reasons why the child was perfect.

"Well it makes sense that when one has a perfect Mommy and a perfect Daddy that their little boy would also be perfect! Doesn't it my perfect little man? See Petunia our boy answered me! He is such a smart little boy! Of course with a smart Mommy and smart Daddy you can expect-" This continued though out breakfast, realizing she couldn't talk to her husband just now Petunia soon joined in the praising of their son.

At 9:00 Lockhart left for the appointment with his manager who wanted to speak to him about how he felt about deodorant commercials. He kissed his wife and his son and happily went out the door. On the way to his car his noticed a cat. It was a lovely cat he thought perhaps Jr. would like a cat? But Petunia would not like a cat or dog for that matter. He was backing out of the driveway wondering what his wife would think of a parrot when he saw the cat reading a map. He stopped the car and stared at the cat which now looked perfectly normal and was giving him a stern look. For a moment the smile left his face and he felt uneasy. He couldn't think of any reason for _them_ to be here. True that his sister, but she couldn't do that. Well even if it was it had nothing to do with him. He had broken no laws nor done anything to make an enemy with _those_ people.

Still he felt unsettled as he slowly left his driveway. Perhaps he should invest in some protection from those that would do his family harm? Of course he would have to contact someone that could set up wards if he did that and that thought didn't bother him, but it would bother Petunia and he hated keeping anything from his wife. Finally he decided he was being silly. He was imagining things. Some a wonderful as he would have a vivid imagination so of course he was worrying over nothing. Even if it was nothing it wouldn't hurt to look into some otherworldly protections. Petunia spends most of her days in the house with the baby when Lockhart wasn't home this hadn't worried him before, but now that he thought about it-

Lockhart forced himself to stop thinking. If he kept on in this manner he would look a horror when he reached his destination. With that thought in mind he turned on the radio and fond some cheerful music for him to sing along with loudly.

His appointment went very well. His manager told him his toothpaste contract was running out this year, but that they had already contacted him to renew it. They were also interested in putting _his_ smiling face on the tube of toothpaste! It was all very exciting and they hadn't even started talking about the deodorant yet. Lockhart and his manger who were very good friends, deiced to go out to lunch and start talking about the deodorant commercial over fresh bread and Italian pasta.

They took Lockhart's car and began an interesting conversation about good publicity vs. bad publicity and just what really was bad publicity? However there was a distraction.

"I say Gilderoy! Look at all those strangely dressed chaps there!"

"Wha-my word!" Lockhart gasp recognizing the people in cloaks for what they were.

"What are they doing?"Lockhart said aghast. They were breaking the thing! They were out in the open! They were insane! Lockhart had to talk to one of them right now!

"I don't know Gilderoy. They certainly don't know a thing about fashion that's for sure."

"Oh-I –um." Lockhart hurriedly parked the car.

"I'm going to see what goings on!" And he jumped out of the car and throws himself into the crowd of people.

"What are you doing?" He exclaimed grabbing a man and making him look at him. The man was smiling and grabbed him in a bear hug.

"Celebrating! Rejoice sir for Who-Know- You is gone!"

"Wait-What- He is?" But Gilderoy could get no more information out of the man and soon had to return to his car and tell his manager something about the people collection money for charity.

Needless to say Lockhart was distracted the rest of the day. He barely got though the lunch with his manager and then excused himself saying he had a hair appointment he needed to get too. Deciding he would never be able to convince his wife nothing was wrong if he was so unusually tense he quickly made a spa appointment. A message and soothing face mask would be just the ticket.

And it was just the ticket by the time he was done all strange thoughts were happily out of his head instead he had blissful thoughts of his face on a toothpaste tube. After the spa treatment he went and bought his wife flowers. Lockhart loved flowers and as Petunia never got him flowers he often got them for his wife. This time he bought colorful orchids and a nice new green vase. On the reflection that he would soon have three contracts with teeth, hair, and now deodorant and he knew he would be making more money he promptly took out a credit card and drove to the mall. He had seen some really cute baby outfits and there was a new face cream he was dying to try. You know he did have wonderful skin, maybe he should do commercials for face and hand creams?

And that was that. Lockhart came home, told his wife the good news about his work and surprised her with some perfume he picked up along with the flowers, called in the sitter and went out to eat with his wife. The sitter saw the news about owls flying in broad daylight, but thought nothing of it. The Lockharts came back late, paid the sitter and went to bed.

That morning Mr. Lockhart was again the first to rise. He really did have a hair appointment only it was that morning at 9. It was while he was in the shower that he heard Petunia scream, this was why he found himself wet and mostly naked with only a towel and a hair net on in front of the open front door in full view of the neighbors looking down at his wife who had slumped to the ground in a sitting passion with her eyes wide in shock and the sleeping baby next to her that he was quick to realized was not his son.

(So what do you think? I have the next chapter written and I will post it when I have at least 10 reviews. If I don't get it then I shall work on my other stories that I really need to work on.)


	2. Avoiding the cubboard

( I really want skip 10 years like in the books, but I think you need to know how they reacted to having Harry in their home. I have the chapter for Harry ten years from now written, but I'm thinking of doing some snap shots of the years in between. Tell me what you want to see and I shall try to write it!)

(Oh and I did say I wouldn't post until I had 10 reviews, but I do have 5 people that reviewed and 5 that used alerts and 5 that used favorites. If they are the same people they are very dedicated readers and if they are different then I have 15 people. So yeah it works out.)

Last time in our story we left Mr. Lockhart mostly naked at the front door looking at his nephew for the first time. Mr. Lockhart did in fact recover his jaw from the floor and pull both child and wife fully into the house and shut the door. Harry Potter's arrival was shocking and it brought with it very sudden change. For one thing that day marked the very first time Lockhart had ever missed a hair appointment. For another it marked the day Petunia first completely lost her head and tried to shove the child in the cupboard under the stairs and forget about it. Of course Mr. Lockhart couldn't allow that for it was such a ridicule notion it must have been brought on by hysteria.

Half an hour after Mr. Potter's arrival into the Lockhart house hold, Mr. Lockhart found himself still mostly naked in the kitchen holding the now awake and hungry baby in his arms while he held up Dumbledore's letter in the other trying make sense of Dark Lord being defeated and Harry needing to stay with them. Poor Petunia after losing her mind had insisted that he 'Fix it!' and had taken their son with her into their bedroom and locked herself in.

Now the first thing Gilroy did was try to stay calm. His wife was no help what so ever right now and so it fell to him, the husband, the protector, the bread winner, the amazing five times winner of London's whitest teeth and nicest smile award to deal with the situation. Putting down the letter he stared at the brilliant green eyes looking up at him and the fresh cut of his forehead.

To help gather his wits about him he began to talk to the baby.

"Well, Harry…just us here. Um…sorry about Petunia she um well her sister did die and oh dear…"

Petunia had read the letter before she went crazy and what a horrible way to tell someone their sister died! He had to comfort his wife right away! He put the letter on the table and then looked at the baby.

"Err…that cut looks painful. At least it's not ugly you know a lightning bolt is a pretty cool looking scar. Oh right that hurts doesn't it!" He should get cream for the boys head. Some kind of pain reliving medical something for it and then he should feed the baby because heaven knows Petunia wasn't going to. Right take care of baby first and then?

He wilted slightly at the idea of canceling his hair appointment. Was putting the child in the cupboard really such a bad idea? He snorted at the thought, he wasn't stupid after all. If they didn't treat the child well social servers would be called and while they would be happy to have the child taken away it was just asking for them to try and take Junior. The very thought was horrifying. And anyway while this was not a good thing it didn't have to be a bad thing.

Harry Potter was famous, a hero in fact and he Gilderoy Lockhart was the boy's uncle. He would be raising the boy who killed You-Know-Who. Why lots of people, wizards in fact would give anything to be in Lockhart's position right now. It made him fill with pride to think of what his sister would say. With a truly devilish smirk he deicide to right to sister it had been far too long since he has written really.

"Oh Harry. Harry, Harry, Harry. You're a famous little boy do you know that Harry. Now you're not as perfect as my son your hair for one is terrible, but you have been given some potential Harry. And don't you worry for Uncle Gildy is going to see that you live up to your potential Harry. Now let's see about getting you something for your head and some food, but first!"

He looked down at his towel around his waist.

"Uncle needs to finish his shower and dress. This means my dear boy that we must get Petunia to come out of the bedroom. I can't take you into the shower with me now I can?"

But he did. Not into the shower, but into the bathroom so he could finish his shower. Petunia was determined to be completely unreasonable. She would not come out so she could watch the baby. She would not even come out to properly speck with him while he was holding the baby. It was with concern for Junior being in there with her and not having eaten yet that he agreed to take the child with him to the bathroom so Petunia could come out to eat and feed Junior.

Petunia's reaction was worrying. Gilderoy took a very fast shower while trying to watch the child sitting on the bathroom floor he was certain the child would hurt himself if he wasn't watching it. He had gotten the cream for the boy while in the bathroom. Seeing the baby start to fuss Lockhart hurriedly dried himself and pulled on some clothes. This was another first for Lockhart as he had never paid such little attention to what he was wearing.

It hard to brush much less style ones hair when holding a fussy baby so Lockhart gave it up after a few moments and determined he would simply not leave the house today. He took Harry into Juror's room and hurriedly dressed him in clean clothes and a clean diaper. The ones he had come in were dirty. Holding the child close he tiptoed into the kitchen hoping his wife was now calm. She wasn't.

Petunia was crying into Junior's baby food and Junior was starting to fuse because he wasn't being feed fast enough.

"Oh…Honey." It was hard to comfort a wife while holding a baby she would freak out upon seeing. He dashed into the living room and put Harry on the floor.

"Stay! For just a second!"

And he ran back to the kitchen so as to hold and sooth his wife. She accepted his embrace and mumbled apologies at him though her tears. Unable to calm her he ushered her back up the stairs so he could attend to both children. The ten minutes it took to do that made both the boys to become more distressed with being ignored for so long. He pulled his crying son into his arms and ran into the living room to fetch his crying nephew. Neither wanted to be comforted, but if he sat one down they would panic and scream all the louder.

Finally he was forced to put them both in the playpen and hurriedly make two bottles while trying to ignore their wails and trying not to cry himself and think what a horrible father and now uncle he was. Finally he was able to lie on the couch with the two children on his chest both of them calmly taking a bottle as if they had never been screaming their lungs out a few seconds ago.

Exhausted he was greatly reviled when they both fell asleep and thinking of the pros and cons about dozing off himself when the phone rang. Groaning he carefully moved the children off him and onto the couch where he hurriedly covered them with a blanket and moved pillows around so they couldn't fall off. He answered the phone.

"Hello Lockhart residents."

"Gilderoy! Where are you? You've never missed an appointment and I was worried sick!"

"Oh Monica! Yes I meant to call and cancel-"

"Cancel! Is little Gildy alright and Petunia?"

"Yes-No. Her sister died."

"Oh Gilderoy I'm so sorry for her if there is anything I can do."

"Thank you Monica, but we we'll be- actually there is something."

"What is it Gilderoy?"

"Well her sister and her sisters husband died they have son Junior's age, of course we are the next of kin-"

"You're taking him in?"

"We found him on the doorstep actually. Petunia did and there was letter telling her about her sister-"

"Oh how awful! That's how she found out?"

"Yes Monica. Anyways I'm taking care of two babies right now and Petunias shut herself in our rooms so I really can't-"

"You can't take care of your wife and two babies at the same time of course you can't. Well you know I clear two to three hours to make sure I can get everything done. If I leave now I can give you at least an hour and a half of relief so you can see to Petunia, but I will need to go back to work after that."

"Oh thank you Monica! They both just fell asleep so I don't think they'll be much trouble'"

"Don't you worry your beautiful head about it Gilderoy! That's what friends are for you know!"

Yes he did know he had just forgotten, but with remembering came hope. Lockhart had nothing if not good looks and close friends; he was after all always charming and helpful. Not only was their Alfred his manager and Monica his hair dresser, but he was close friends with his doctor, dentist, lawyer, bank accountant, his old school teachers, all the workers at the local Gap deportment store that he used to work at for his first job and still visited, he could claim friendship with a number of neighbors, and he had of course been popular at school and so had a number friends from school. Yes with remembering came hope.

Mr. and Mrs. Lockhart, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly happy, thank you very much. They were the last people you would expect be touched by a tragedy mostly because the husband was so darn cheerful it seemed nothing could make him frown. Which was why when Mr. Lockhart called up the neighbors to tell them that his dear wife's sister was dead and if they could check up on her when he went back to work he would appreciate it he was bombarded with offers of baby sitters and casseroles.

And that was how Harry Potter came to live with the Lockharts and how he avoided being forced into a cupboard.


End file.
